After a year of drama, friends, arguments and laughs it's safe to say I wouldn't change it for the world. University is all about finding who you are and adjusting to those around you.
I can't lie and say that it has been an easy year for me, mainly because I didn't surround myself with the best people to start off with but as the year's progressed I have found people who love me for me and I couldn't be more grateful for that.
I started Bournemouth University quite naive. I thought that everyone that you were nice to would be nice back and that they were your mates. I made friends with my flat mates, the flat next door and got on well with my course mates but I learnt the hard way that you're never going to get along with everyone but the people you do bond with, will be there for life.
Name Calling Doesn't End In School
I've learnt that people can change when they're around others. They may say things to you in front of others to hurt your feelings and to make them feel superior. In reality they say these things because they are not secure in themselves and honestly it shows. I've learnt that quite often people are quick to say these things when they've had a bit to drink but when they're sober they act like nothing has happened. They will try everything in their power to get under your skin, whether thats calling you names, talking about you to your friends etc and the way to get around it is to just ignore it. They are looking for a reaction.
At first like anybody else would do, I took it personally and did get upset but you have to remember that if you do get hurt by it and they see that then it is only going to carry it on. Instead I've learnt to rise above it and focus on the people who deserve my time and attention which has allowed me to make the most amazing friends. In times like these then it is important to keep your head up and focus on how strong you are.
People Will Judge
Another thing you should remember is that people will judge. I went through a period of becoming so anxious that I didn't feel like I could leave my room or go to University due to the fear of being judged about what I wear and by what I say. I would turn up to classes and either not go in or go in not saying a word to anyone because I was too scared to put myself out there but I've now learnt to accept it and be myself otherwise if you carry on like this then you will lose sight of who you are and you will regret it.
Sometimes it's the people you least expect it to be. People who you don't really know or talk to but once they hear a bit of "juicy gossip" then they approach you and ask questions just to share their unwanted opinion.
When you're around these sort of people then you just have to shrug it off and walk away. There's no point arguing back or wasting your breath on them. Remember that they're not your friends for a reason and if you let these people treat you like you're nothing then you'll start to believe it.
You Will Make Your Friends For Life
It was hard for me to open up to people and I didn't believe for a minute that "you will meet your friends for life at uni" but now I have a house with them and I wouldn't change them for the world.
I've also learnt that you will make friends who will love you for who you are and it will outweigh the negative people. These friends will spend your birthday with you, make you feel special, laugh at the stupid things you do when you're drunk and support you with every decision you make or guide you to the right ones.
You Will Learn To Find And Love Yourself
This was the best lesson I've learnt. The good and the bad times shape you into a stronger person. You learn to handle situations better and you start to mature whilst still living a crazy life! You have the freedom to do whatever you want and to make the wrong choices which you later learn from! University is your time to do what you want and to make you realise that you are the priority, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks or says as long as you're happy.
It is easy to focus on the negatives but this is just a little insight of what I've learnt throughout the whole year. I haven't written about the countless amazing nights I've had and the funniest times. University hasn't been a negative experience at all, it's been a learning curve. I've had my ups and downs like everyone, but in the end you're still having an amazing time. You will meet people who you love which will out weigh the negatives. They will fight with you and make you feel like you again.
